I just got back from the Hay House “I Can Do It!” Conference in Toronto. It was a seriously magnificent day and has left me super charged on positive, spiritual energy!
Because of that, I’ve been inspired to write about something that I often think about, and something that many of the speakers spoke to today. I had the honour of listening to Wayne Dyer, Marianne Williamson, Michael Chase, and Robert Holden all speak to some extent or another about the relationship between our soul and our ego.
The whole time I was doodling my way through the concepts. For hours I was drawing stick people to represent how we actually co-exist with these two entities.
One of the things that has become super clear to me today and in my experience, is that as humans, we have an unbelievable ability to oscillate between our ego and our soul at any given moment. . We can strip away the ego and show the soul.
I mean that we can switch back and forth between the wisdom-filled sage and the drama-infused mortal.
I think back to recent conversations I’ve had with friends and co-workers and I find it unbelievable how we, in one instant are able to give such strong advice and in another we plea for that same advice to be given back to us.
I had this experience this week, when I was comforting to my friend, tears streaming down her face, as she talked about a challenging relationship. 20 minutes later, I was also stirred to tears over my own personal relationship journey and suddenly she was the confident cool sage. She instantaneously became my source of advice and support.
How often do we find ourselves telling someone something that we are so sure of – “just listen to your heart”, “be firm with your needs and stand your ground”, or “don’t be so hard on yourself, love yourself first and foremost.”
Why is it easier to speak the truth to someone else than to ourselves?
This is the ego at play.
From what I’ve gathered today and in my own experience is that our ego, aka our conditioned personality or our “head”, is like a cloak that we wear to cover the purity of our being, aka our “heart”, or our soul.
As babies, we are literally and figuratively born naked. We don’t yet have a cloak.
As we are exposed to the circumstances that life gives us – the trauma of getting rejected, feeling failure, feeling inadequate, experiencing heartbreak, sadness, or anger – our ego works overtime to weave us an even thicker cloak.
As time goes on, this cloak becomes our shield. It protects us from experiencing more of what hurts. In the midst of our drama – “I lost my job”, “My family is unbearable”, “My boyfriend didn’t call me” – the cloak is all that we think we have to cope. The more we wear it, the more we come to identify ourselves as the cloak that we wear.
If you imagine the ego as a stick person sitting on top of your shoulder, the stick person is holding out the cloak for you. In his right hand he is also carrying a suitcase full of belief systems that you have collected over the years.
The suitcase might be full of things like, “I suck at relationships, I’m never going to find a romantic partner”, “I have to prove myself through my accomplishments in order to be accepted in the world”, or “if I lose 10 lbs then I’ll finally be happy.”
The cloak and the suitcase prevent us from actually feeling and connecting with what our soul is actually experiencing and saying on the inside.
But it doesn’t change the fact that we are still pure and naked souls underneath.
And yet, when we seek guidance and advice, we seek what is actually inside of us.
How can we be so resilient when it comes to others drama, but not our own?
It seems that in times of connection with others our ego shrinks and our soul comes out to play. When we feel safe and feel like we are supporting others, we remove the cloak effortlessly.
So the point is, in every given moment we have the ability to switch. We have the answers. We don’t need to ask the ego stick person for a cloak.
Those around us are the best mirrors for what we are all capable of. We are capable of being our own sage.
If we listen to the advice that we give others, we are listening to our soul. ☺
